Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property wpdb::$categories is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 668

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property wpdb::$post2cat is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 668

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property wpdb::$link2cat is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 668

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Theme::offsetExists($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetExists(mixed $offset): bool, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-theme.php on line 554

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Theme::offsetGet($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetGet(mixed $offset): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-theme.php on line 595

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Theme::offsetSet($offset, $value) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetSet(mixed $offset, mixed $value): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-theme.php on line 535

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Theme::offsetUnset($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-theme.php on line 544

Deprecated: Return type of WP_REST_Request::offsetExists($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetExists(mixed $offset): bool, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-request.php on line 960

Deprecated: Return type of WP_REST_Request::offsetGet($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetGet(mixed $offset): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-request.php on line 980

Deprecated: Return type of WP_REST_Request::offsetSet($offset, $value) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetSet(mixed $offset, mixed $value): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-request.php on line 992

Deprecated: Return type of WP_REST_Request::offsetUnset($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-request.php on line 1003

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::current() should either be compatible with Iterator::current(): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 151

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::next() should either be compatible with Iterator::next(): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 175

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::key() should either be compatible with Iterator::key(): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 164

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::valid() should either be compatible with Iterator::valid(): bool, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 186

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::rewind() should either be compatible with Iterator::rewind(): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 138

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::offsetExists($index) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetExists(mixed $offset): bool, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 75

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::offsetGet($index) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetGet(mixed $offset): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 89

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::offsetSet($index, $value) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetSet(mixed $offset, mixed $value): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 110

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::offsetUnset($index) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 127

Deprecated: Return type of WP_Block_List::count() should either be compatible with Countable::count(): int, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-list.php on line 199

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property wtfplugin_1_0::$package_slug is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/divi-booster/core/wtfplugin_1_0.class.php on line 23

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Post_Cache::$cache_table_name is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/includes/class-search-filter-post-cache.php on line 37

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Post_Cache::$term_results_table_name is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/includes/class-search-filter-post-cache.php on line 38

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Post_Cache::$table_name_options is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/includes/class-search-filter-post-cache.php on line 40

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Post_Cache::$option_name is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/includes/class-search-filter-post-cache.php on line 41

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Display_Shortcode::$plugin_slug is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/public/includes/class-search-filter-display-shortcode.php on line 20

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Display_Shortcode::$is_form_using_template is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/public/includes/class-search-filter-display-shortcode.php on line 29

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Display_Shortcode::$is_template_loaded is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/public/includes/class-search-filter-display-shortcode.php on line 32

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Display_Results::$plugin_slug is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/public/includes/class-search-filter-display-results.php on line 31

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Display_Shortcode::$display_results is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/public/includes/class-search-filter-display-shortcode.php on line 34

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter::$display_shortcode is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/public/class-search-filter.php on line 87

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter::$third_party is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/public/class-search-filter.php on line 90

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property POMO_FileReader::$is_overloaded is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/pomo/streams.php on line 26

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property POMO_FileReader::$_pos is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/pomo/streams.php on line 29

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property POMO_FileReader::$_f is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/pomo/streams.php on line 160

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property MO::$_gettext_select_plural_form is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/pomo/translations.php on line 293

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property POMO_FileReader::$is_overloaded is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/pomo/streams.php on line 26

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property POMO_FileReader::$_pos is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/pomo/streams.php on line 29

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property POMO_FileReader::$_f is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/pomo/streams.php on line 160

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property MO::$_gettext_select_plural_form is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/pomo/translations.php on line 293

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property Search_Filter_Register_Widget::$plugin_slug is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-content/plugins/search-filter-pro/includes/class-search-filter-register-widget.php on line 34

Deprecated: DateTime::__construct(): Passing null to parameter #1 ($datetime) of type string is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/script-loader.php on line 333

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Block_Type::$skip_inner_blocks is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-type.php on line 347

Deprecated: Calling get_class() without arguments is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-http.php on line 328

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Cookie_Jar::offsetExists($key) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetExists(mixed $offset): bool, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Cookie/Jar.php on line 63

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Cookie_Jar::offsetGet($key) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetGet(mixed $offset): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Cookie/Jar.php on line 73

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Cookie_Jar::offsetSet($key, $value) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetSet(mixed $offset, mixed $value): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Cookie/Jar.php on line 89

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Cookie_Jar::offsetUnset($key) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Cookie/Jar.php on line 102

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Cookie_Jar::getIterator() should either be compatible with IteratorAggregate::getIterator(): Traversable, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Cookie/Jar.php on line 111

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Utility_CaseInsensitiveDictionary::offsetExists($key) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetExists(mixed $offset): bool, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Utility/CaseInsensitiveDictionary.php on line 40

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Utility_CaseInsensitiveDictionary::offsetGet($key) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetGet(mixed $offset): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Utility/CaseInsensitiveDictionary.php on line 51

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Utility_CaseInsensitiveDictionary::offsetSet($key, $value) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetSet(mixed $offset, mixed $value): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Utility/CaseInsensitiveDictionary.php on line 68

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Utility_CaseInsensitiveDictionary::offsetUnset($key) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Utility/CaseInsensitiveDictionary.php on line 82

Deprecated: Return type of Requests_Utility_CaseInsensitiveDictionary::getIterator() should either be compatible with IteratorAggregate::getIterator(): Traversable, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/Requests/Utility/CaseInsensitiveDictionary.php on line 91

Deprecated: trim(): Passing null to parameter #1 ($string) of type string is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp.php on line 173

Deprecated: ltrim(): Passing null to parameter #1 ($string) of type string is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 3030

Deprecated: ltrim(): Passing null to parameter #1 ($string) of type string is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/wp-db.php on line 3030

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198

Deprecated: Creation of dynamic property WP_Term::$object_id is deprecated in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-term.php on line 198
Rushing to a Wedding | Josh deLacy
Select Page

Deprecated: Using null as an array offset is deprecated, use an empty string instead in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-type-registry.php on line 167

Deprecated: Using null as an array offset is deprecated, use an empty string instead in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-type-registry.php on line 167

Deprecated: Using null as an array offset is deprecated, use an empty string instead in /home/calvinwr/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-block-type-registry.php on line 167

I dropped my pack over the barbed wire fence, followed by my sign, and then the sandwich and iced tea my last ride had given me. Dusk had ended half an hour ago, and right now, a spot behind the only tree in sight looked like a good enough place to pitch my tent. The scraggly juniper wouldn’t hide me from any passing eyes, but at least the highway fence would separate me from the road—which, judging by the last ten minutes, wouldn’t have many passing eyes traveling on it anyway. And besides, I’d be gone at first light.

I knew I wouldn’t make it to my friend’s wedding. I had hoped to be in Oregon by now, but Thursday night found me in northern California, still fifty miles from the border—and five hundred and forty miles from Wenatchee, my end point. Nine and a half hours of drive time remained.

The optimistic part of me compared that to the whole day and a half left until the six-o’clock wedding on Saturday. But the rest of me knew better.

Viable hitchhiking time is not the same as viable driving time. Night hours are out. Early morning and late evening are long shots, too, since few drivers take to the roads then, and most that do avoid anyone hitchhiking at such a strange hour.

And I couldn’t expect to find ride after ride that would take me all the way to the wedding in one brisk procession. Hour-long waits would bloat my pace, and I knew I’d stumble into Wenatchee just in time to find an empty church and a long-completed ceremony.

I ate my sandwich inside my tent. Mosquitoes whined and perched on the mesh like vultures. Tomorrow, I would start hitchhiking at first light—even before sunrise—and I’d keep it up until total darkness. Then first light again, until Wenatchee or the six-o’clock cut-off. I don’t pray often, but I did that night.

*

Only half a dozen cars passed in the first half hour. Not because the road was never traveled, but because it was too damn early. I knew it, and I knew I didn’t have a way around it. Even if I gave up and bought a bus ticket—an idea that grew on me with each passing car—I’d still have to make it to a major city first. The only way to leave this highway junction in Remote, Northern California was by private vehicle. I smiled at an approaching minivan and knew my smile looked fake.

But the minivan pulled over.

A man a few years older than me rolled down the passenger window and waved me over. He was alone in the van, but the seats were filled with boxes, bins, and backpacks. He was moving.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“I’m going north.” Even to myself, I sounded hopeless.

He paused. “How far north?”

“All the way to Wenatchee, Washington.”

“No shit.” A smile, wry and a little suspicious, started and kept growing. “That’s where I’m going. You can keep me awake.”

Josh deLacy